A Spouse’s Perspective on the Lambeth Conference

The Lambeth Conference—as an introvert, I both looked forward to and dreaded attending. From meeting with other spouses of Bishops (via Zoom instead of in-person because of Covid), I learned that we would be broken into small groups of 8-10 with other spouses from around the globe. Which meant, I was sure, that I would have to hear the simple phrase that accelerates the hearts of introverts: Let’s go around and introduce ourselves.

Because I am on the board for the Spouses Planning Group as their new tech person, I was asked to set up a WhatsApp group for spouses attending Lambeth, which turned out to be really helpful for a number of things from setting up a luncheon for what we termed the “mauve spouses”, the partners of gay and lesbian bishops who were uninvited to Lambeth (although four spouses did show up and were invited to tea by Caroline Welby, wife of the Archbishop of Canterbury) to tracking down a Bishop who had unintentionally left her vaccine card in an airport lounge at Heathrow.

Working with the app also helped me to acquaint myself with some of the spouses attending Lambeth. So, the first time I was asked to introduce myself, I was already familiar with a number of spouses. (photo of Caroline Welby)

The second time was when we began our spouses retreat and we were separated into small groups. “Table 26,” my badge read so I found my table and sat. At that point, there was only one other person at the table. By the time the retreat began, we’d been joined by two more spouses. We were the smallest small group at the Conference, which turned out to be a blessing for both me and Apollo, the husband of the first female Kenyan Bishop, who is also an introvert. Also in my group were Flora, the wife of a Bishop from Zimbabwe, and Steve, the husband of a Bishop in England. Interestingly, and we couldn’t discover another group that had a similar situation, Flora’s and Apollo’s spouses were in Frank’s small group.

Once the retreat was over, we fell into a more regular pattern for our remaining time at the Lambeth Conference. I found that what we did fit in well with the Five Marks of Mission, something talked about regularly around the Anglican Communion, though rarely in America.

Tell: To proclaim the Good News of the Kingdom
Each day, a Plenary session or two would be held in the largest venue (Venue 1) in which both bishops and spouses were invited to attend. There, speakers would talk about the subject for the Lambeth Call that day. This varied from Mission and Evangelism to Christian Unity.

Teach: To teach, baptize and nurture new believers.
Every morning, we would start the day with a Bible Exposition on the verses from I Peter that we were reading that day. This was for both bishops and spouses in Venue 1 and was usually led by Archbishop Justin Welby.

Tend: To respond to human need by loving service.
We would then break up into our small group Bible studies with the Bishops crossing the street to gather at the Parkwood Apartments in small groups and the spouses hurrying over to Venue 2 to gather at our round tables. Here we would look at the verses we had just heard about and speak to them in what became the favorite phrase at the Lambeth Conference: in my context. Because the gathered bishops and spouses were from more than 160 countries from around the world, the context for a spouse in South Sudan was different than the context for a spouse in Pakistan, which was different for a spouse in Malaysia, which was different from a spouse in America . . .

We were able to share within our small groups just how the verses from I Peter spoke to where we were from. We also heard testimonies from spouses around the Communion on everything from their personal relationships with God to the persecution they suffered for being Christian in a Muslim country. Each Bible Study ended with a different Diocese or Country entertaining us with Christian songs from their area in their language. Among those who sang were spouses from South Sudan, the DRC, and Ghana.

Transform: To seek to transform unjust structures of society, to challenge violence of every kind and to pursue peace and reconciliation.
While the bishops worked on these subjects in their Lambeth Calls sessions, spouses were offered a chance to attend what were called “Strengthening Sessions”. These were courses broken up into four sessions of three subjects: Personal Wholeness, Leadership, and Community Action.

As an introvert, I took that time to be alone and recharge my battery for the following day’s program. I did this with the knowledge that all sessions would be available to me online to “attend” once I returned home. In addition, on some days, bishops and spouses were given the time to attend panel discussions on everything from safe church to menstruation.

Treasure: To strive to safeguard the integrity of creation and sustain and renew the life of the earth.
This was the subject we learned about on the day that we were invited to Lambeth Palace in London. After walking an outdoor prayer path and enjoying the gardens and lunch, we gathered to attend a short service as a tree was planted as part of what is known as The Communion Forest. This is a global initiative that will include local activities of forest protection, tree growing, and eco-system restoration that is to be undertaken by provinces, dioceses, and individual churches across the Anglican Communion in order to safeguard creation. Our Creation Care Commission will be working with this initiative in the Diocese of Georgia.

This is just a taste of the many things we were able to do together as bishops and spouses of the Anglican Communion. It was an eye-opening experience as the more than 1,100 of us ate together in the dining halls of the University of Kent and worshipped together at Canterbury Cathedral, taking away memories that will last a lifetime.

Victoria
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